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During my time in the scene I have had the pleasure of working with many Doms and subs alike. I was only about 6 months into my performing career when Halloween came about. We were all, "the gang", invited to perform at the Vivid Video Halloween party. Dressed as a fetish prom queen complete with black pvc ball gown, opera length gloves, 6in spike heels and a crown we head out for what I thought would be a fairly tame night. I was wonderfully wrong about how the night would progress.
Arriving early, as always, we took the time to stop by the bar and grab a drink, the only one I would have all night. We wandered off to find our space and set our gear up preparing for the rest of the night. Darling and I were left to attend to our tasks while Sir went and explored the rest of our performing area. We were pleasantly surprised to learn that not only did we have a "dungeon" room complete with bondage table, hanging steel grid and attachment points all over the walls, but we also had a fully outfitted medical suite, bedroom and barn with 4x4 exposed ceiling beams. Our space fears had been laid to rest and we were free to begin playtime.
As soon as we stepped across the threshold of where we would begin our scenes I was ordered to strip down to nothing but collar and shoes this being my true outfit for the night. I was outfitted as an owned slave. I began to slide into my role of party slut easily enough, knowing anyone and everyone would be allowed to use me that night. I was anticipating being passed around, having each person leave me dripping wet panting like a dog. I would not be disappointed. After folding and placing my clothes in a bag I slid seductively to the floor kneeling in position #4. #4 is my favorite, I believe it serves to show the lines of a slave's body in the most feminine way possible. Once on the floor I slowly allowed my legs to slide as wide as they dare, exposing my little pink pussy to the room without concern. Bending at the waist my breasts were the first thing to touch the floor as I set my right cheek against the cold stone closing my eyes. Raising my arms above head I press my biceps against my ears extending my arms fully. Turning the palms of my hands up I place one on top of the other showing my submission. Arching my back and raising my hips just a little allows anyone visual access to the softness contained between my legs. Having settled into position I await the slightest motion or sound that will alert me to my Masters readiness for me.
After a word from Sir Blaze I began to prepare for a fire play scene. Settled quietly on my knees in a corner I began laying out the implements I knew would be needed. Setting a pair of torches against my knees I filled the fuel canister with kerosene and placed the wick ends of the torches into it. Wetting a towel with a bottle of water I completed my preparations. Settling into position #2, a resting position, I spread my knees wide, place my hands palm up against my thighs and lower my eyes to the floor. I remain silent, left in anticipation of what was to come. Just when I thought I had been forgotten I heard my name called from across the room. Gracefully rising from my position on the floor I gather everything and move across the floor beginning to tremble. I hand everything over and lay face up on the table as instructed. The room goes dark as a blindfold shields my vision. I am left untethered allowed the freedom of movement but restricted by the command to remain motionless. The first thing I feel is the gentle heat of a torch being passed above my body teasing me lovingly with its crackling flame. The first caress of flame ignites against my belly I struggle to remain motionless against the pleasure of it all. I can hear the gasps of those positioned around the room and I smile gently to myself. The second lick of flame ignites on my flesh this time my upper thigh feels the heat as he allows the flame to burn just a little longer. He continues on allowing the fire to burn against my flesh just a moment longer each time. All I want to do is cry out as the fire begins to burn my flesh, I can feel the wetness sliding down from in between my thighs the pain turning into the most amazing pleasure. Nothing gets me panting like a slut more than pain, I love to be hurt. I remain still as long as I can but it finally gets to be too much and I throw my head against the table my back arching, breasts raising towards the ceiling I cry out in pain, pleasure, need... He chooses this moment to stop, being just as evil as he could. I lay on the table whimpering, every fiber of my being crying out for more. Needing more attention, more pain more pleasure. Instead I was pulled by the hair from the table and made to bow before the audience. Sent to a corner shaking gently I was left. A used toy cast aside for now. The heat radiating from my body hotter than the fire I had just been tormented with. My skin angrily red and tender to the touch, I gently rubbed at it relishing the experience.
Having had maybe 5 minutes to rest and contemplate I heard my name again, this time called by a voice other than my Masters. I lifted my chin, making sure to keep my eyes downcast, to show that I had heard the call. It was the voice of Master Rob telling me I had been loaned to him for the time being. I slowly rose to my feet, fear almost getting the better of me. I obediently followed a step behind into the medical suite. I was ordered onto the table where I was fully exposed my legs spread wide around the base my tender flesh stretched taut. I could feel the sensual scrape of leather as cuffs encircled my wrists and ankles holding me in position completely. I was immobile, helpless and confused. My breath became heavy with the intensity of my conflicting emotions. I still had no idea what I was in for, I trusted that Sir and Master Rob had discussed what was going to happen and it had been approved. From behind me I heard a loud crackling noise that lasted only a few seconds. My heart jumped into my throat and my breath stopped as realization slapped me in the face. That was electricity, he was going to torture me with electricity. (At the time) Nothing terrified me more than the flashing blue light and crackling sound that emitted from a violet wand. My breath began to come in gulping gasps. I heard a voice tell me, "he said this was your one fear", I began to shake in terror. The noise crackled and I felt the sharp sting as the blue bolts touched down on my inner thigh. I screamed in fear, in pain, in anger. Why was he letting this man do this to me, he knew, this was the worst thing ever. I heard a clucking noise; it was a woman explaining to me that slaves were meant to be beautiful and silent unless told otherwise. An "O" gag was forced behind my teeth and strapped firmly in place to keep my cries silent. The flashing pain continued to travel through Master Rob's fingertips traveling lightly over my skin. I thrashed as much as possible within my restraints trying to escape those fingers that sent jolts of tingling pain coursing through my body.
At some point my screams of anger turned into gasps of delight. I had hit the threshold, I had gone beyond the pain and was only feeling pleasure now. The coursing jolts brought shockwaves of pure energy sending me into spasms of pure passion. I began to moan the word "please" over and over as best I could through my gagged teeth. He must have understood my babbling at some point because I was told that it was not time yet. I bucked under his nimble fingertips holding back, attempting to dam the flood that was my release. I felt nothing for a moment, no touch, no jolt, nothing but the table beneath me. I almost began to cry. I was sure I could not contain myself much longer, but I would be punished severely if I came without permission. When I thought that my torment had ended and I would be allowed to cower used and alone in a corner until my passion subsided I heard the crackling again. A hand was thrust against my already aching sex and I saw flashes of white light behind my closed eyelids, I knew I could not control myself any longer, I was going to lose it. Before I had the chance to disobey I heard the word I had been longing for all night, "NOW". A primal moan escaped my throat as I came, the lust hit me with a vengeance. I felt torn in half, the intensity was so great I did not know how I would come out on the other side. His hand still pressed against me, still sending jolts through me, I hit climax after climax. The leather that restrained me cut into my soft flesh tearing layers of skin away. My body arched so hard I was all but lifted from the table, my shoulders the only thing touching it, my weight balanced on the cuffs at my ankles. As quickly as his hand was placed it was taken away. I hit the table like a broken doll shuddering tears coursing down my cheeks. My breath came as fast ragged gasps, I shuddered, and my whole body ached. I could not stop the tears, I was so relieved it was over, yet I craved more. I wanted more abuse, more torture. Instead I was left, muttering and shuddering straped to the table.
After a while, I am not sure how long, a friend came and unstrapped me. I was completely unsure as to whether or not I could stand. I slowly rose to my feet ankles and knees knocking, teeth chattering vision blurry. Just when I was sure I would be given time to recover I heard a voice calling my name. I took a deep breath and hurried to the call. "Yes Sir Nik" I said breathlessly to the one who had called. He instructed me to go back into the dungeon and stand ready to be tied. Weak with exhaustion and dizzy, my excitement for the next challenge began to grow. I moved as gracefully as I could manage to the center of the floor underneath the steel grate in the ceiling. Taking a deep breath I parted my legs standing feet shoulder width apart, moving my hands to the top of my head I raised my chin and arched my back. To accentuate the length of my neck I lifted my chin and turned my head slightly to the left, always keeping my eyes at the floor. I lengthened the lines of my body in every way I knew how, raising my chest, tilting my hips rearward, arching my back, I wanted to be perfect. I would do anything to have Sir Nik spare me just a little. I knew already how cruel a Master he could be. I had felt his hand, whip, cane, whatever he pleased many times before. I feared Sir Nik like no other man, and I knew my Master had given him full rights to do with me what he pleased.
As he entered the room I heard him explaining to the gathered crowd that this was to be an actual training exercise. That they would witness what a slave goes through while learning to be obedient. My eyes widened, I had no idea what was about to be done to me, and worse I knew nothing of his personal training style. The ropes began to pull against me, gripping me tightly I was attached to the ceiling, strung up. I had been fully restrained, arms behind back, legs spread, ready to receive the training he would impart. I had no idea what I could do tied as I was though and this only served to make the nervousness all the more. He removed a large wooden paddle ball paddle from his bag and spun it in his right hand menacingly. He announced that he would teach me the acronym S.O.A.P. which stands for
S-Serve your needs
O- Obey your orders
A- Accept your discipline
P- Please your desires
He repeated them to me allowing me to mimic him one time after that. He then began calling the letters at me in a random order giving me three seconds to reply with the correct rule. When I could not come up with it quickly enough, or did not word it exactly so he would swing the paddle at me slamming it against my bare ass with such force that it would have knocked me off balance had I not been tied up. I could feel the welts rising and the bruises forming already. He continued on this way until I had called back the letters correctly 3 times. My body sung with the pain, every nerve alive, taking it in, turning it into a fire I felt burning from my toes to my hair. My body flushed with pride, with passion, with lust. I wanted nothing more than for someone to come and rape me where I stood. I needed to feel the pleasure of being used along with the abuse. I kept silent just wishing, hoping, praying that someone, anyone, would come and take me. Instead I was lowered from the grate and allowed to crumple to the floor where I curled for a moment. I felt a boot kicking me not so gently in the ribs. I was told not to rise as a note was shoved in my mouth. "Go find your Master, the note is for him". I crawled slowly out of the room, soreness beginning to set in, every muscle begging for mercy screaming that I had endured enough.
I crawled down the hall looking in every room, searching. I finally found him in the bedroom and crawled to his feet placing my head down on his boot. I turned my face to the side showing that I had a note for him in my mouth. He took it from my teeth, and as he read it I placed small kisses on his boots and calves. When done reading he put the note in his pocket without a word. Once again I was dragged to my feet by my hair and thrown over the footboard of the bed, palms on the mattress. I felt the hard thump of floggers coming down on my back. They rained down with blurring speed setting my back alight. This was my favorite, this is what I had been waiting for. I felt myself begin to relax I found a quiet moment where all I had to focus on was pure pleasure. No fear, no anger, just warmth. The heat gathered at my throbbing slit the wetness sliding from within to gather trapped for the moment at my lips. Sliding into the deepest subspace I had felt all night the blows became harder and harder, I rolled with them, found their rhythm and swayed with the waves of leather across flesh. I breathed slowly, calmly while I was thrust forward with every strike. No sound emitted from my lips as I focused on the pain and the beauty of it.
It stopped. As I exhaled and began to say my thank you's I felt the first kiss of his dragon tail across my back. Pain exploded in my head, my eyes rolled back, knees buckling I was close to hitting the floor. It felt as though my back had been laid open, I wondered if I was bleeding. A deep breath, I knew it was coming soon. As I exhaled the next blow came, I slipped away inside my head allowing my mind to do what it did with pain. The pain was registering as pleasure, I was sliding deeper and deeper into my own space. I only know how many blows I received because I was able to count the lash marks the next day. I was given eight lashes, each one leaving its blackened mark on my flesh. I knew I had done nothing wrong, so why had he been so harsh with me? He came and stood behind my trembling body. I have no idea how I remained on my feet, but I knew I had to. He pressed his hardness against me a needy groan passed through my lips as he began to shift his hips back and forth. Grabbing me by the throat bowing my body back he brought my ear to his lips and whispered to me, "that was reward, not punishment". I shook my head, I had no idea what he meant. He asked me about my subspace, about how deep I had gone. We spoke for a moment and it slowly came to me. He had pushed me beyond all limits, had taken me to a new plane, a new level of the pain pleasure combination. I have always felt spiritual while in deep subspace. It is pure and uninterrupted. I think of nothing but the pain, I reflect in on myself, I am allowed a moments respite from my own mind. All thoughts stop, I can be just quiet.
My arousal had grown to the point of pain, everything from bellybutton to mid thigh throbbed, red blotches came to the surface and I began to cry with need. Tears slipped from my eyes dropping onto the comforter. When I thought I would pass out he turned me over and threw me onto the bed face up. I panted grateful, expecting to be fucked, given release, I thought he would be merciful. I was wrong. A flash of steel, the light glinting off a blade held lightly in his hand. My eyes went blurry and I was unable to see until it was all over. The knife was pressed firmly against my throat causing me to breathe very carefully, unlike the panting I had been doing all for hours. For the first time, but not the last, I felt my blood run. It was too much for me, I pleaded with him, "Sir please, please allow me to cum, please Sir I cannot see I cannot withhold anymore". I cried while begging, shaking uncontrollably, knowing I was causing the slashes I felt bleeding. Unable to control myself, unable to stop moving, unable to stop cutting myself I continued moving. He was merciful. Pressing his hand against my throat cutting off my blood flow he bit down on my ear as he commanded "NOW". The waves did not stop for almost 10 minutes I was told later. His fingers slid inside me not moving, just filling me. Pressing the heel of his palm against my clit he allowed me to writhe against him. I screamed with passion. My cries were loud enough for them to hear down the hall. I don't what happened while I was lost in pleasure so intense it would have driven me to insanity had it not been allowed release. All I remember is my vision coming back as my breath slowed. Someone was pressing juice to my lips, forcing me to take sugar, knowing I had none left in my body. I was allowed to rest there for some time.
Sir had gone downstairs to retrieve a friend who had just flown in from Boston, bringing with him boxes of 18 gauge needles and scalpels he had taken from the hospital where he was doing his residency. Darling came to fetch me and I was led into the medical suite once again. I looked around and saw that Sir, Greg and Lance were all waiting for me. The intensity of seeing the 3 of them standing around a table filled with not only the needles Greg had brought, but also Lance's piercing supplies was enough to make me look towards the door. I had never even thought of bolting before this. Darling was standing in the doorway though, I had nowhere to go. I dragged my feet as I moved to take my position on the table again. Laying almost flat with my belly up I tried to relax. I love needles. They are an amazingly freeing experience, everyone takes me a little further away until I give up and nothing but the pain matters. I lose myself in it and just exist for that moment, that feeling. Nothing but that. I began taking deep breaths turning my mind in on itself, preparing for the peace. There was movement all around me, they were making their own preparations of a different sort. I felt the coldness of alcohol being poured on my marred flesh. The sharp smell filled my nostrils, it was about to begin, my body trembled with anticipation, the fear slowly melting away as I began my slow descent.
I felt two gloved hands pinching skin, making marks, feeling the canvas they were working with. The prodding stopped and I felt one hand on each side of my chest pinch skin with authority and then the first two needles slid through. One through each side of my chest just below my collar bones. The pain was amazing and I heard the most beautiful words said to me all night, "you do not have to ask for the rest of the night". As soon as the last word crossed his lips an orgasm ripped through me like a freight train. I could feel the pool of wetness beginning to gather beneath me. I could feel the pinching of fingers again as Greg and Sir each pinched more flesh and the next set of needles slid through me. The brightness of the pain threw me into the passionate throes of another orgasm, I struggled to remain still. I drifted farther and farther away, the pain lessening with each stick. The room around me faded away as I lived the pain. The piercings continued, sixteen down the front of my body in all. My eyes rolled slowly up and back, I lost all concept of the real world, time seemed to stand still. When the needles were done I began to feel the clean slices of razor sharp scalpels cutting the flesh in my arms. My blood ran, the smell of it pushing me further down. I could feel them taking the needles out, the clack of them falling into the sharps container. I was slowly regaining a sense of things going on around me. I was made to sit up, the blood ran down my torso and legs staining the white towels I lay on. My entire body tensed hard and then relaxed, my mind clearer than it had been in a long time.
I had one last trial. Lance was my piercer. He had pierced my nape once already and I was ready for the second one. It was three inches long and going at the base of my neck in the back. I could barely feel them working on my neck, I was still deep in my head space. I felt one final needle pass through me as I came again ready to explode, or pass out, or die, I wasn't sure which. Unfortunately something was going wrong, after a few minutes I quickly began to slide out of space noticing the worried voices. The piercing had gone fine, but the jewelry was being a problem. It would not come out the other side, no matter how much they dug around. It was after about fifteen minutes when I started hearing them talking about cutting it out with a scalpel that I fully came around and called it off. I was done, worn out could not handle anymore. The jewelry was pulled and the alcohol rained down on my body to disinfect my wounds. The smell slid me a little further back down and I lay back relaxing. Everyone but close friends were cleared out of the room while I was allowed to reflect, recover and be a blank canvas.
I just lay there in complete and utter exhaustion until I was told it was time to go. The sweats I had brought with me were placed next to me and I slowly dressed. I stumbled towards the car and fell into it, immediately slipping into undisturbed sleep. I don't remember anything more until the next day.
I woke up early and the entire world seemed just a touch brighter. My outlook on life was fresher, I felt an all over calmness. My night had not been plagued by the nightmares that so frequently kept me awake. My mind was quiet for once. I began to examine my bruises and a smile crossed my lips each time I remembered where they came from. The burns were red and bright, electrical burns, bruises, welts, cuts, piercing holes covered me, reminding me. I poked at each one to feel it sing with new pain. During the most intense moments of pain my mind is at its clearest. I feel like everything will be ok, my head is allowed to clear itself of all the worries that come with everyday life. I find peace in pain. I find understanding. I find myself. Everything seems a little better, and I feel a little more like working as hard as I do everyday knowing that nights like that will come. Those nights remind me that people care about what I need.
That night I acted like the slut I needed to be. I abandoned will, and thought for my own needs. I was allowed the freedom of not having to think at all. I simply went where I was told, and endured all the pain I could. I pleased my Master and in pleasing him I was given more pleasure than any one human should ever know. To this day, close to 3 years later, I sometimes think about that night. When the images begin to cross my thoughts I can feel the heat start burning in my belly, the longer I think the hotter it becomes. My pussy begins to throb with the memories of pain, and being dominated so fully. If I think about it long enough and allow myself to relive moments of it, I can cum just from that. No touch, just a mindfuck, it is an amazing orgasm. One like nothing I have ever experienced before. I am going to go crawl under the covers and mindfuck myself now.